The Top Ten Seahawks Stories That Weren't: #9: Kentwan Balmer

Rob [Rang] says he has a strong feeling that the Seahawks are going after Kentwan Balmer, in large part because Rocky Bernard was arrested earlier this week. Bernard also is in the last year of his contract, so even if this case is never tried there is a chance that Rocky is not back next season.

Rang was the credible opinion in the sea of speculation. I don't know if draftniks are pimps, swindlers or con-men, but google "NFL Draft" and you'll get results as obscene as "Riverboat Bukkake" and as disturbing as the first four images found under "Homer Tattoo". There's just not much substance out there. The Balmer rumors gained steam and soon best as I tried to ignore them, a response was necessary.

This is how I imagine most mock drafts are constructed: Identify team need, put in highest ranked available player at said need. This highly complex process has Seattle drafting Kentwan Balmer in the first. Analyst determined Seattle needs a defensive tackle, Balmer is the highest ranked available player at that position. Zounds. That's all well and good except Seattle absolutely will not draft Kentwan Balmer. Not a chance. Here's why.

And then I explained why. I probably cursed. I do that a lot. Dingo.

Ruskell would later say he was never interested in Balmer. A five second survey of Ruskell's previous drafts disqualifies the pick. Balmer raised more red flags than the commie color guard. His late career spike and look good in shorts athleticism caught suite salesman Mike Nolan's eye and...dare I say?...Kismet. Balmer demurred, but eventually fell for Nolan's advances. The rest is draft bust history.