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Owen Schmitt Signs

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Thus ending speculation he'd instead opt to work at a dry cleaner.

Since this is news, I'll just go ahead an preemptively report:

Red Bryant signs.

John Carlson signs.

Lawrence Jackson signs.

A source deep within my skull, somewhere between my amygdalae, confirms it as a near eventuality.

I refuse to post that god-forsaken video of Schmitt crying.

                                                                                                                                                                                                               

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