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What the Losers Are Saying: Jacksonville Jaguars

If anyone follows my blog (the 6 of you know who you are) then you'll be familiar with a weekly segment I do entitled "What the Losers Are Saying", which aims to look for the best in humor, insight, ranting, and analysis from several team-specific blogs and/or forums. The obvious catch is you have to lose to get on the list. I have way too little time to cover every loss but I usually pick teams that were blown out, blew a big lead, or lost a heartbreaker. Here's a taste test of a recent edition, which was dedicated to the Washington Redskins after losing 19-14 to the Detroit Lions.

Someone here suggested that I do WTLAS on Field Gulls (I think it was wyte_lightning who made the suggestion) and he has convinced me to do so. For every week the Seahawks win there will be a special edition dedicated just to our defeated opponents. I couldn't have picked a better time to debut this.

Come on and take a trip with me to Jacksonville to see how the glum are coping with their favorite team capitulating at Qwest!

Star-divide

In-Game: Hass to Burleson to Make it 20-0

YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!!!!

I have been a Nelson apologist since he was drafted... I OFFICIALLY GIVE UP ON HIM

Well, that's game over folks. If we don't score this next drive I'm turning off the TV and going outside.

###### kind of hit was that Mathis? He just patted him on the back...

MATT HASSELBACK [sic] = DREW BREES

no energy.... no heart... no tackling.... no points.... no win.... hello top 15 pick in next years draft... hello LA

While we're rebuilding, maybe we can get Rashean some testosterone shots, because he is seriously lacking in something. What a sissy.

Fantastic angry quotes from the Jaguars forum's 1st half game thread.

I didn't even bother to include several quotes saying we're a terrible team. Some angry trollish comments about moving the team to LA also trickled its way in.

In-Game: Curry Forces the Fumble, Cory Redding Recovers

Well that's a start.

Maybe now an actual Seahawk will grab the ball and drop it in Burleson's hands for a TD.

Nice....they are hitting David every time he drops back. Why can't we get to their QB I wonder?!?!?!? Maybe because Harvey is a bum.....we wasted multiple picks to get a guy who will be no better then Spicer when it is all said and done. I mean JC we can not even beat a guy they just called up last night to play.

More gold from the Jaguars forum in the 2nd half.

Aaaaaaand one more from the game!

In-Game: Nick Reed for Six!

JESUS!!!!!!! Just amazing And when I think it can't get any worse i will be in a mild form of depression until next sunday really, this is the epitome of bad. The worst they have ever been. Just fu*(ing stupid this is the worst ive ever seen from the Jags. Completely inept.  2nd Half Game Thread from the excellent Big Cat Country.

History shows that this is the 3rd largest defeat in Jaguars history. They've been bested 44-0 and 58-13 but those were many many years ago. If there was a day where everything went wrong for them, it was this last Sunday. No turnovers, one sack, 4 TDs allowed, 1 defensive TD against, recovered none of the 3 Seahawks fumbles, you name it, Jacksonville did not have it go their way. Not that there's anything wrong with that....

Post Game: Jaguars Collapse in the Trenches

"Well, the Jaguars lost horribly yesterday to the Seahawks. I really don't know what to say about the utter failure of the lines to make an impact at all. Those calling Derrick Harvey a bust can no longer be legitimately retorted. Unless he begins a drastic change and starts showing improvement, which isn't likely, then he'll finish this season with a similar number of sacks to last year (3.5). It's becoming apparent that the Jaguars lost their best defensive lineman when Heyward went down. Harvey was up against a man promoted from the practice squad, and got little to no pressure against a pass-first team. Inexcusable. That's all, just totally inexcusable. Not everyone played horribly, but the lack of pressure was the main issue here, as coverage wasn't horrible besides a few blown assignments. When you have that kind of time, you will complete throws, that's a fact. An NFL QB is not going to throw many picks or poor passes unless they are under pressure.

David looked bad, but in my opinion, the blame rests squarely on the shoulders of the offensive line. Tra Thomas started the game, which many fans have been clamoring for. Well, you got what you wanted, an old, slow, veteran stop-gap who was beaten badly early. He was replaced by Monroe, whom the Seahawks immediately targeted. Monroe responded by playing as he has all season... inconsistent. That's the issue, the QB's blindside was routinely attacked in successful ways early on. Once the Seahawks had a comfortable lead, we saw less blitzing, but still pressure routinely got to Garrard... inexcusable."

sliencecs also from Big Cat Country after witnessing the Jags' "pass rush" and "offensive line" go to pieces on Sunday.

Hope you guys are glad we didn't go after Eugene Monroe. Actually I bet you he would've just gotten injured instead of playing inconsistently.

Post-Game: Fire Jack Del Rio

"The Fans have completely lost confidence in your ability to coach this team. We've asked Wayne [Weaver] to fire you, even though you have that new contract and it would cost him a bundle. So what? In the grand scheme of things, virtually any coach he replaced you with would automatically put butts in seats and elevate the level of the team. Cowher, Gruden, Shanahan - all of them are available for a price, and if Wayne wants to stay in the NFL he needs to be willing  to pay that price. Those coaches are proven commodities in this league, and The Fans would be happy with any of them. You were a nobody when he hired you, and seven years later you're still a nobody.

Winning two games in a row didn't fool anybody, because The Fans knew you couldn't keep that up. What happened in Seattle was that the team was exposed for what they are - a bad team. The Offense sucked. The defense sucked. The QB sucked so badly you replaced him with a guy who got beat out by Leftwich. The play calling sucked. And most of all, the coaching sucked. You got humiliated by a Quarterback playing with a broken rib? How does that make you feel"

Whomever writes at firedelrio.com. I think this website was put up a few days ago.

I really don't think asking for his head at 2-3 is the best idea but Del Rio has a 52-49 record in 6 and 5/16 seasons with playoffs in just 2 of those. He's done well to get the Jags back into respectability in recent times but he is the AFC's John Fox. Make the playoffs one year, then suck the next one or two seasons. Neither he nor Fox has made the playoffs in consecutive seasons and Fox is on track to keep this trend alive. Got a feeling that if they both miss the postseason then they're goners based on inconsistency, not necessarily being Rich Kotite bad.

Post-Game: Ranting on Youtube (NSFW Language)

Jaguars vs Seahawks week 5 (41-0 L) (via Cartman19x)

 

 

UPDATE AT 10/15/2009, 3:31 PM PST: If you thought that was funny, dagraham in the comments section found a 10 minute crow-eating rant. Thanks dagraham!

 

Post-Game: Eating Crow (More NSFW Language)

Jaguars vs Seahawks Postgame Crow (via coloradosnum1jagsfan)


 

That's all I have. I wanted to publish this sooner but I was swamped for time so sorry it's out this late in the week. The other bad thing is the Jaguars have a small fanbase so it's hard to find some good blogs and forums. It's always good to know how the other half thinks when they're the ones getting their butts brutally kicked by the Seahawks.

Check back next week when the Cardinals make an appearance!

Comment 87 comments  |  4 recs  | 

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No problem.

The average human being supposedly eats 8 pounds of food per day. Aaron Curry eats 8 humans for breakfast.

by SSreporters on Oct 14, 2009 4:16 PM PDT up reply actions  

Thanks.

The average human being supposedly eats 8 pounds of food per day. Aaron Curry eats 8 humans for breakfast.

by SSreporters on Oct 14, 2009 4:40 PM PDT up reply actions  

Wow, that youtube video is epic.

Always makes me smile when the Seahawks cause opponents fans to lose it.

by MFAN on Oct 14, 2009 4:29 PM PDT reply actions  

I enjoyed his empty beer bottles.

He was obviously drinking heavily with what the Jags did to him.

by Wilder. on Oct 14, 2009 8:25 PM PDT up reply actions  

That webcam got what it deserved.

With an umbrella no less. Why did he have an umbrella?

Child please...

by Airborne Hawk Guy on Oct 14, 2009 4:49 PM PDT reply actions  

Basically..

It isn’t odd to have an umbrella around, especially in October. Maybe he doesn’t put his umbrella in a closet, or maybe he is just unorganized.

by Pessimistic Optimist on Oct 14, 2009 5:15 PM PDT up reply actions  

He looked like a golfer.

He was probably cleaning his golf bag out and it was sitting just off the screen, and the umbrella was conveniently located right there in prime “break shit” location.

Mancrushed. Jake Locker for Heisman 2010.

by Tyler Jorgensen on Oct 15, 2009 1:23 AM PDT up reply actions  

Thanks for taking the time to put this article together

This just makes me feel even better about the win. I think the youtube vid was the icing on the cake. I look forward to your upcoming piece about the Cards fans next week!

Karma police, arrest this man.

by wyte_lightning on Oct 14, 2009 4:55 PM PDT reply actions  

If we beat Dallas,

I’m going to absolutely love to see the reactions on here. A mighty big if, but oooh man the reactions would be priceless.

by Fear on Oct 14, 2009 4:56 PM PDT reply actions  

Blogging the Boys

Is the best after a loss. They go crazy with Romo.

The average human being supposedly eats 8 pounds of food per day. Aaron Curry eats 8 humans for breakfast.

by SSreporters on Oct 14, 2009 4:57 PM PDT up reply actions  

I'm not gay or anything ...

… but he’s not that good looking of a dude.

That Kyle Orton, though …

The demise of the Broncos in '09 is our future. Pray hard.

by Nick Andron on Oct 15, 2009 1:12 PM PDT up reply actions  

Ew, no.

Rodgers looks like Shaggy from Scooby Doo

"Mayhap a hidden door lurks nigh. Let us search the environs."

by Fearless Frog on Oct 15, 2009 10:38 PM PDT up reply actions  

Rodgers I could see

But Cassel’s head is fucking weird looking. Then there’s Matt, and I’ll just say this about Hass…when I wake up having nightmares about how within 10 or so years I should start to go bald…I think of Hass and feel ok. He pulls it off.

by DJ C-Raig on Oct 16, 2009 2:43 PM PDT up reply actions  

David Carr

I will smash your face into a jelly.

by Phil Hatzenbuehler on Oct 16, 2009 11:13 AM PDT up reply actions  

If we beat Dallas

I am going to be shocked. Happy, mind you but quite shocked. It’s a road game isn’t it? Against a pretty tough team. Of course we are supposed to have most of our current walking wounded back on the field for that game so….here’s hoping I am shocked, LOL!

by mrcoffee1969 on Oct 15, 2009 7:09 AM PDT up reply actions  

Someone sucked the soul out of that team.

Seriously, overtime with the Chiefs? Really?

"Mayhap a hidden door lurks nigh. Let us search the environs."

by Fearless Frog on Oct 15, 2009 9:52 AM PDT up reply actions  

I lol'd so hard.

"Mayhap a hidden door lurks nigh. Let us search the environs."

by Fearless Frog on Oct 14, 2009 6:03 PM PDT reply actions  

Can we do a "What Fearless Frog Is Saying"

whenever the Seahawks lose? That would be pretty funny.

by aerozeppelin on Oct 14, 2009 6:34 PM PDT up reply actions  

" The_Occidental_Tourist (10/13/2009 at 3:35 PM)" Report Violation
Wow. Kyle Williams and Damion MacIntosh. We’re saved. Sure is a good thing Tim Numbskull ignored the offensive tackle position in the off season and draft.

Heh.

But yeah, I’m not creative enough to come up with anything than the same old.

"Mayhap a hidden door lurks nigh. Let us search the environs."

by Fearless Frog on Oct 14, 2009 8:01 PM PDT up reply actions  

That guy is an infamous ESPN troll.

The Pedro Calderon/Logan/Mr. X of the Seahawks.

by redwolf75 on Oct 14, 2009 9:41 PM PDT up reply actions  

Aren't they all on the ESPN boards?

It's Great to be a Florida Gator!

Next year's notable Ex-Seahawks:
Walter Jones, Patrick Kerney, Seneca Wallace

by Wayward Llama on Oct 15, 2009 5:11 AM PDT up reply actions  

Schadenfreude

Made all the more strangely pleasing because, as Hawks fans, we’ve all been there more times than we care to remember. See, e.g. post-Colts game.

by jeager on Oct 14, 2009 6:16 PM PDT reply actions  

Great stuff.

I’m not going to lie though, I kind of wanted to see a SF blow out piece instead…

by LantermanC on Oct 14, 2009 6:27 PM PDT reply actions  

That deserves an Lol

I think we’ve developed a sadistic humor towards the Jaguars when they implode on themselves.

"HULU: An evil plot to destroy the world. Enjoy"
The Flavour of the Day is Turf. - Courtesy of the Jacksonville Jaguars
Keeper of the "That's what she said"

by TheTealDeal on Oct 14, 2009 6:31 PM PDT reply actions   3 recs

also rec'd

"HULU: An evil plot to destroy the world. Enjoy"
The Flavour of the Day is Turf. - Courtesy of the Jacksonville Jaguars
Keeper of the "That's what she said"

by TheTealDeal on Oct 14, 2009 6:33 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

Not quite as bad.

I noticed the top 15 pick (seems kind of safe). Though then it follows up with moving to LA, which is worse than a 0-16 season.

by LantermanC on Oct 14, 2009 7:18 PM PDT up reply actions  

It seems like it.

It’s really comparable to the P-I blogs and the Seahawks Insider blogs.

Sam Bradford, future Seattle Seahawk.

by Carl Shinyama on Oct 14, 2009 7:28 PM PDT up reply actions  

I am interested in your ideas

And would like to subscribe to your newsletter. I laughed pretty hard.

by DJ C-Raig on Oct 14, 2009 7:28 PM PDT reply actions  

Maurice Jones-Drew BAAAWS after beatdown:
Still reeling from a 41-0 loss at Seattle, Jacksonville Jaguars running back Maurice Jones-Drew lashed out at the team’s play-calling, its lack of offensive identity and its constant shuffling of offensive linemen.

Frustrated? Try furious.

Jones-Drew denounces Jags’ O, moves

"Mayhap a hidden door lurks nigh. Let us search the environs."

by Fearless Frog on Oct 14, 2009 8:03 PM PDT reply actions  

Chrono Trigger eh?

Bringing me back…good times.

by DJ C-Raig on Oct 14, 2009 8:09 PM PDT up reply actions  

No, his picture.

Was like my favorite game for the SNES back in the good ol’ days. Before all these “graphics” an’ such.

by DJ C-Raig on Oct 14, 2009 8:44 PM PDT up reply actions  

I only had to have it for a few weeks.

Seemed fitting to take it off after a dominant beatdown.

"Mayhap a hidden door lurks nigh. Let us search the environs."

by Fearless Frog on Oct 14, 2009 10:06 PM PDT up reply actions  

I'd like to see this every week.

Although I can’t enjoy it quite as much coming from Jags fans. It’s gotta be sickening to be in a minority of people supporting your local NFL team, knowing that a loss like this can cost you your favorite team. I was pretty young, but I remember how bad it felt thinking we were going to lose the Seahawks to L.A, and would not wish that feeling on anyone.

by Mind of no mind on Oct 14, 2009 8:53 PM PDT reply actions  

I'm still furious we have the Storm.

If we were going to get rid of the Sonics, I’d make it a priority to bundle them along too.

"Mayhap a hidden door lurks nigh. Let us search the environs."

by Fearless Frog on Oct 14, 2009 9:25 PM PDT up reply actions  

Storm probably wouldn't do as well in OKC.

You’d think women’s basketball would be big in Seattle if it were big anywhere.

Also, I hope Sue Bird never leaves. LoJack can leave (and she will), but let’s keep Sue Bird til she retires.

by LantermanC on Oct 14, 2009 9:29 PM PDT up reply actions  

The reason women's basketball isn't very popular

is not because of sexism. The NBA is all about athleticism. Athleticism that can never be matched in the WNBA, unless you’re fielding a team of Caster Semenya clones

by redwolf75 on Oct 14, 2009 9:45 PM PDT up reply actions  

that website is hilarious

firedelrio.com… these jacksonville fans are so melodramatic. I’m sure they were all hyped before coming to Qwest. Pretty sweet to be on the soul-crushing side for once…

by supershane on Oct 15, 2009 3:12 AM PDT reply actions  

Anyone see

Jack Del Rio trying to intimidate Jon Ryan during warm-ups?

by DJ C-Raig on Oct 15, 2009 10:50 AM PDT reply actions  

I suppose a blowout loss that puts your career in jeopardy is karma for being a hardass to a punter.
Danny O’Neil of the Seattle Times says Jack Del Rio’s pregame antics amused Seahawks receiver T.J. Houshmandzadeh. Houshmandzadeh: "It was just kind of crazy, man. Jon Ryan was out there punting, and I guess he may have been in Jacksonville’s area. And he [Del Rio] just grabbed the ball and threw it and was like, ‘Get the [expletive] on your side of the field.’ "

Per Sando’s blog.

"Mayhap a hidden door lurks nigh. Let us search the environs."

by Fearless Frog on Oct 15, 2009 1:55 PM PDT up reply actions  

If you have 10 minutes

I suggest you watch this one too (pardon if it’s been mentioned already and I just missed it):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=73ylxjtd8zE

Poor kid deserves better. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

by dagraham on Oct 15, 2009 12:12 PM PDT reply actions  

It's caught fire within the last couple years.

I considered doing it last season and becoming some sort of YouTube celebrity until I remembered nobody cares about the Seahawks.

"Mayhap a hidden door lurks nigh. Let us search the environs."

by Fearless Frog on Oct 15, 2009 1:16 PM PDT up reply actions  

I still cringe after watching that Dallas fan's jubilation when Julius Jones signed with us.

Did you know that he doesn’t run with any heart?

"Mayhap a hidden door lurks nigh. Let us search the environs."

by Fearless Frog on Oct 15, 2009 1:51 PM PDT up reply actions  

You would find his AOHPR stat is below average

The average human being supposedly eats 8 pounds of food per day. Aaron Curry eats 8 humans for breakfast.

by SSreporters on Oct 15, 2009 5:27 PM PDT up reply actions  

Below STARTER average? o_0

Or just below the average number of times Romo doesn’t fumble a game away?

And all the land was in ruin, and burnination had forsaken the countryside.

by Cheddar28 on Oct 16, 2009 12:50 AM PDT up reply actions  

Wait

I thought Julius Jones was average?

by rex92 on Oct 18, 2009 4:21 PM PDT up reply actions  

Not really

But I enjoy listening to them more than reading Steve Kelley’s bullcrap.

The average human being supposedly eats 8 pounds of food per day. Aaron Curry eats 8 humans for breakfast.

by SSreporters on Oct 15, 2009 3:13 PM PDT up reply actions  

1st minute of that clip alone is gold

I saw his pregame video and he said they should beat the Seahawks easily.

The average human being supposedly eats 8 pounds of food per day. Aaron Curry eats 8 humans for breakfast.

by SSreporters on Oct 15, 2009 3:18 PM PDT up reply actions  

Going to update the post and put it in there

Great find dagraham. Haven’t laughed harder. For the most part he’s pretty articulate on why the Jags sucked that day.

The average human being supposedly eats 8 pounds of food per day. Aaron Curry eats 8 humans for breakfast.

by SSreporters on Oct 15, 2009 3:28 PM PDT up reply actions  

So what happens this week?

Do you find video rants by seahawk fans on youtube?

by redwolf75 on Oct 18, 2009 11:47 PM PDT reply actions  

It's redundant this week.

This blog doesn’t need a link to itself.

by thebyron on Oct 19, 2009 6:16 AM PDT up reply actions  

Plus it isn't funny...

when it is US! It only works when we’re watching others misery…

Bird Law in this country isn't governed by reason.

by Tyler Jorgensen on Oct 19, 2009 1:58 PM PDT up reply actions  

I'm doing something special this week

It’s sort of a “Classic Edition” if you will.

No Seahawks WTLAS for this game since we lost.

October 11th, 2009: The day Justin Forsett became loved by Seahawks fans forever.

by SSreporters on Oct 19, 2009 2:19 PM PDT reply actions  

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