Top 5: Seahawks Beat Chiefs!

There is very little for Seahawks fans to brag about when it comes to our history against the Kansas City Chiefs. Our all-time record against them is 18-31, for a .367 winning percentage. This record of futility and despair makes the few aberrant Seattle wins all the sweeter... Here is the top 5:

5. 11/21/99 Seahawks 31, Chiefs 19

4. 12/26/99 Seahawks 23, Chiefs 14

That game in KC was the high-water mark for the 1999 Seahawks. It was only the 5th Seattle win at Arrowhead EVER, and it ran the Seahawks' record to a gaudy 8-2. After such an emphatic win at the Seahawks' Temple of Doom, I started figuring out how I could scrape together the time and money for a road trip from Columbus, Ohio to Atlanta in January, because my Hawks were XXXIV bound, and my grad school ass was going to be there. It turned out that Ricky Watters' infamous throat-cutting gesture after the game-sealing run at Arrowhead was predicting Seattle's gurgling from gaping neck wounds for the next month, not the demise of the Chiefs. The Hawks were 8-2, and the Chiefs were a lackluster 5-5.

Over the next month, while the Seahawks plummeted into a dark, cold abyss, KC marauded through its schedule destroying any obstacles in their way. I was at the Kingdome's final regular season game, and the Seahawks entered that one in a completely zombified state. Seattle hadn't won since Arrowhead, and it looked like Mike Holmgren's first season would end in a historic collapse, particularly with the streaking Chiefs coming to town on a four-game WINNING streak. Look, I'm not a moron. I know the players are the ones who scored the points, who made the tackles, etc. But on that day, one couldn't shake the feeling that 64,000 Twelves would simply not allow the guys wearing blue to lose. The ONLY time a Seahawks home crowd was ever louder than Boxing Day 1999 was the 2005 NFC Championship, and the Chiefs, an otherwise solid team that year, was obviously and absolutely freaked out by the atmosphere in the Dome. Elvis Grbac was less poised than a meth addict, chucking three picks and making Kitna look competent in comparison.

The Hawks got shanked by the Jets on the road the next week, and needed an OT FG from THE RAIDERS to win the AFC West on the basis of this head-to-head sweep over KC. Then the Hawks would send the Kingdome into retirement (in the way replicants in Blade Runner were "retired") with an embarrassing Wild-Card loss to the ancient Marino and his unremarkable Dolphins.

Jesus, 1999 sucked, didn't it?

3. 11/4/84 Seahawks 45, Chiefs 0

Your usual NFL blowout quickly becomes a turgid, boring affair. This particular game was quite different... It was a competitive game into the second quarter. In fact, KC was deep in Seattle territory and only trailed 3-0 when Dave Brown snagged an errant throw and raced 90 yards the other way for Seattle's first touchdown. Then it was Keith Simpson going 76 yards for another defensive TD, and the rout was on like a bad check from Homer J. Fong. As if to more deeply humiliate KC's quarterbacks, Dave Krieg threw two touchdowns, and it was 31-0 at halftime.

While Coach Knox mercifully tried to shorten the game by calling almost nothing but running plays, the Chiefs kept throwing it and Seahawks defenders kept scoring touchdowns... One more for Brown in the 3rd, and one for DPOY Kenny Easley in the 4th. THREE KC quarterbacks combined to deliver six interceptions to Seattle DBs. Hell, Terry Taylor snagged two but that ninny couldn't find his way to the end zone even once. Loser. Seattle's four interception returns for TDs in a single game is still a league record.

2. 11/27/83 Seahawks 51, Chiefs 48 (OT)

This is still probably the most entertaining regular season game in team history. The Hawks came in 6-6, and needed a win to keep any hope of postseason play alive. At the half, the Chiefs led 28-14. Early in the 4th, they led 42-31... But the Seahawks never stopped digging those talons into the flesh of the KC invaders... Chuck Knox used rookie stud Curt Warner as a blunt instrument of trauma, feeding him the ball 32 times. The former Nittany Lion rewarded his coach by gobbling up 207 yards rushing and notching three touchdowns... However, the story of Seattle's amazing 1983 season probably has a very different ending if KC had converted a PAT attempt late in the 4th quarter. Instead of Theotis Brown's TD giving the Chiefs a 49-45 lead, it was only 48-45. Norm Johnson made one 42 yard kick as time expired to tie the game, and another in OT to give Seattle a season-saving triumph.

1. 11/11/90 Seahawks 17, Chiefs 16

Nothing I would write could really do justice to the historical documents (though I've tried): 

Fun fact: after that joyous day in 1990, the Seahawks would lose 14 out of their next 15 games against the Chiefs. That single win in 1994? By one goddamn point.

Side note: I'll be at the game this Sunday, and I request and require a Seahawks performance so awesome it takes a spot on the the next iteration of this list. I've only seen one loss in person at Qwest out of 14 visits, and I don't intend to witness number 2 on Sunday... 

What do you think, sirs?