John E. Sokolowski-USA TODAY Sports
We won't be eligible to play anyway.
If I have taught you anything, it is that awards matter way more than winning in sports. In order:
- Fast cars
- Ice Bezentynes
- SportsCenter highlights
- Opening up restaurants that are named after you
- A quarter tank of gas in my new E-Class
- YouTube hits and Twitter followers
- Brand sponsorship
- Japanese brand sponsorship
- Starting at quarterback for the Jets
- Winning, super bowls, whatever
- Winning the AFC West
Unfortunately for the Seahawks, they might have a better chance of winning a Super Bowl than going to the Pro Bowl. Lame! No player on Seattle ended up leading their respective position based on the fan vote that was announced on Thursday. Should we worry about this? No, because fans are dumb. Victor Cruz got more votes than Calvin Johnson. Nomar Garciaparra was probably voted to start the Pro Bowl. (I know there are a lot of non-baseball fans so let me instead compare that to Tony Boselli, if he was voted to the Pro Bowl the year after he retired.)
(I know there are not a lot of Tony Boselli fans out there, so let me compare that to Screech winning the beauty pageant on Saved by the Bell. Everybody was a fan of Saved by the Bell.)
So the fans do not like the Seahawks as the best at their positions. This is probably because most fans have only seen them play on Monday night against the Packers and came away with a sour taste in their mouths, forgetting about those eight sacks and basically the fact that Aaron Rodgers (leading vote-getter at QB for NFC) was rendered mostly-useless. They might have also seen the Thursday night game against the 49ers and saw only six points scored. We will see if they have different feelings after Sunday against the Niners, though their chances to change their mind are over. The Pro Bowl is decided on only a fraction of the season! (Which is no different than other sports, which is why, I mean, seriously, how stupid are these awards of recognition?)
Fans only get to decide one-third of Pro Bowl participants though. Coaches and players do the other part of the voting and really, aren't players in a way a worse group of people to let decide on the best players in the league? In a weird way, Charlie Whitehurst is equal to a small-to-mid-level city when it comes to voting. Charlie Whitehurst has the same amount of power as who Kent, WA wants to be the starting punter for the NFC.
(Guy from Kent screams "Woo!")
Fans are already in awe of rookie left tackle Matt Kalil of the Vikings, probably because Adrian Peterson is phenomenal. The 49ers blog Niners Nation said they might want Steven Hauschka over David Akers and Akers got the fan vote for the NFC so if San Francisco people did not vote for him who did?
There are six Packers, five Niners, three Vikings, and zero Seahawks. The Raiders (Janikowski) had more winners than Seattle did.
It really sucks since these things are so important, but now you know, so use this power of knowledge for good. Or evil really. Don't do what I tell you to do unless its to: