After enduring months of draft talk centered around the Seahawks drafting defense, it’s time to have a little fun. Because my sources tell me we’re not drafting Upshaw or Kuechly (my sources tell me I also need better sources). In fact, while we need a better pass rush the only sure fire pass rush talent available (Coples) isn’t sure he likes to play every weekend, or season. So there’s that. And let’s face facts , the Seahawks have a pretty damn good defense and the offense is, well; wanting. So unless you believe Matt Flynn is all the additional fire power we needed, let’s pick some touchdown makers.
Quick first round notes:
Ryan Tannehill and Trent Richardson will probably determine how the whole round goes. If somebody decides to trade up into the Vikings spot to take Richardson (because he’s the best non QB football player in the draft and the Vikings already have one of those guys) then the Browns could be pushed into Tannehill at 4. If no trade happens Tannehill should drop all the way to 8 and the Rams will be left out of the top 5 "elite" talents available this season.
It’s also the year of trading back. Apparently the secret to drafting has been discovered and everybody wants to do it. I’ve rigged this draft so only the Seahawks can, so they get to twice.
These picks have all been tabulated by a special algorithm programmed into my super computer.
1. Indianapolis Colts: Andrew Luck, QB, Stanford
Expecting someone else? No, no you weren’t
2. Washington Redskins: Robert Griffin III, QB, Baylor
No surprise here either.
3. Minnesota Vikings: Matt Kalil OT, USC
Kalil gives Ponder the best chance to live, if nobody tries to trade into the 3 spot.
4. Cleveland Browns:
Mike Holmgren picks up phone, dials St. Louis.
“Hello, this is Jeff”
“Oh hai Fish, this is Mike. Say we hear you guys were really interested in that kid from Alabama and we wanted to give you guys the opportunity to trade up before we draft him, you know to the spot you’d be in right now if you’d be in hadn’t screwed us…”
Click.
Browns select Trent Richardson, Superhero, Alabama
5. Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Morris Claiborne, CB, LSU
Another team with holes everywhere, Claiborne is the BPA
6. St. Louis Rams: Michael Floyd WR, Notre Dame
That receiver you traded for last year? Yeah, you need another one.
7. Jacksonville Jaguars: Justin Blackmon WR, OSU
Robinson was a nice pick up, but Gabbert needs more help.
8. Miami Dolphins: Ryan Tannehill, QB, Texas A&M
The owner says he want that QB kid, the owner gets.
9. Carolina Panthers: Fletcher Cox, DT, Mississippi St.
Biggest need, say hello to best DT. Hear he's helluvatough too.
10. Buffalo Bills: Stephon Gillmore, CB South Carolina
He’s been climbing boards higher than this, the trendy pick to the Bills.
11. Kansas City Chiefs: David DeCastro, G, Stanford
With Winston and DeCastro additions, KC’s line improves greatly.
12. San Diego Chargers (from Seattle): Mark Barron, S, Alabama
In my first trade, I’ve got the Chargers jumping up to get their guy before the Cowboys. It’s one of the latest rumors and is halfway plausible, so I’m going with it.
13. Arizona Cardinals: Melvin Ingram, DE/OLB, South Carolina
The Jets have been rumored to be high on Ingram, possible trade here.
14. Dallas Cowboys: Michael Brockers, DT, LSU
One of the two remaining in Jerrah’s top 5 prospects. They might try to trade up though.
15. Philadelphia Eagles: Luke Kuechly, LB, Boston College
Eagles have quite a few needs, stopping runs up the middle is a big one.
16. New York Jets: Courtney Upshaw, OLB, Alabama
If Rex doesn’t get his guy, Upshaw could be the pick. But this is a wild guess and Upshaw could tumble even further. Jets have needs all over.
17. Cincinnati Bengals: Dre Kirpatrick, CB, Alabama
Losing Jonathan Joseph last year hurt.
18. Denver Broncos (from Seattle): Dontario Poe, DT, Memphis
Yes, I’m reaching for another trade partner here and they need a tackle, badly. Carry on.
19. Chicago Bears: Quinton Coples, DE, North Carolina
Rodgers, Cutler, and Stafford will all cringe when his name is called. Coples and Peppers. Deal with it.
20. Tennessee Titans: Riley Reiff, OT, Iowa
Not a sexy pick, but good value. Especially if they roll Hasselbeck out for another season.
21. Cincinnati Bengals: Kendall Wright, WR, Baylor
16% body fat, say hello to Cincinnati Chili. Another weapon for Dalton.
22. Cleveland Browns: Rueben Randle, WR, LSU
Browns need playmakers, with T Rich and a shiny new receiver, even Colt has a chance.
23. Detroit Lions: Whitney Mercilus, OLB, Illinois
If he’s still on the board, he’ll be a lion. At least that’s what he thinks.
24. Pittsburg Steelers: Jonathan Martin, OT, Stanford
Steelers need help at LB, and they need help keeping Ben upright. LB can wait.
25. Seattle Seahawks (from Denver): Coby Fleener, TE, Stanford
This whole mock is about getting Fleener and extra picks. Mission accomplished.
26. Houston Texans: Cordy Glenn, G, Georgia
Everybody thinks WR, I think line or linebacker.
27. New England Patriots: Chandler Jones, DE, Syracuse
Can you believe the Patriots made the Super Bowl with that D? You don’t get to face Tebow and Flacco every year in the playoffs Bill, better fix it.
28. Green Bay Packers: Jerel Worthy, DT, Michigan St.
Packers badly need a big 3-4 DE to replace Cullen Jenkins and take the double teams off of Clay.
29. Baltimore Ravens: Dont’a Hightower, ILB, Alabama
Best linebacker left, maybe the best in the draft. Easy pick for Baltimore.
30. San Francisco 49ers: Kevin Zeitler, G, Wisconsin
Needs and value meet up here, but they could go Stephen Hill at WR.
31. New England Patriots: Shea McClellin, OLB, Boise St.
Patriots need about 8 more picks on D.
32. New York Giants: Doug Martin, RB, Boise St.
Bradshaw is going downhill and Jacobs is gone. Giants have talked about trading down, but Martin is a do it all back that can help Manning & Co. more than any other player left.
_____________________________________
And that's how we got a FLEEENAH!
Carroll & Co. have hinted at positions they’ll draft in addition to the obvious. As far as I can tell, we’ll be drafting a DE/OLB, S/CB, QB, RB, and a WR/TE and possibly an O line position. It’s just a question of where and when and who’s available.
Trading down twice (dare to dream express, now boarding) brings the Seahawks a late second rounder and an early third for the sake of this exercise. Remaining picks for the Hawks go like this then:
R2: Bruce Irvin, DE, West Virginia
Here is your speed, speed, speed. A somewhat risky pick.
R2: Brandon Taylor, S, LSU
More speed, and a guy that can back up Earl and get in on a 3 safety set. The 2 fast guys and Bam Bam makes more sense than 2 Bam Bams and Earl.
R3: Brock Osweiller, QB, Arizona St.
They’ve said they’ll draft a QB. Don’t threaten me with a good time.
R3: Juron Criner, WR, Arizona
A possession receiver in the mode of BMW. Like his hands.
R4: Chris Polk, RB, Washington
We’re drafting a RB, just a question of where. If Polk slides as advertised he’s a steal here.
R5: no pick
You know, beast mode.
R6: Miles Burris, San Diego St. LB.
Tip of the hat to Charlie Todaro, Miles looks like a player.
R7: I have no clue. Really.
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Since this is the “we want the ball and we’re gonna score” edition, you can see the draft is offense heavy. But, it’s not completely one sided, and I left room for another defensive player in the 7th. But I’d probably pick more offense. Just because; we want the ball and we’re gonna score.
100 votes total
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