Okay, this is more than just about pants. We'll also talk about helmets and jerseys and maybe shoes and gloves. But that title was way too long and is hardly a play on words at all! Where's the fun in that?
Meanwhile, over in the Hawkatorium, there's a lot of fun going on. Fun with these new uniforms and fun with neon, intimidation, and Marshawn Lynch going all cray. I've never really understood the hoopla over uniforms and it's kind of silly when you think about it; the "manliness" of football combined with the "do these colors make me look scawy?" isn't very manly at all. Some people love a uniform and others hate it. I think all that matters is that you look different than the opponent, unless your opponent is better than you in which case you might benefit from looking exactly the same.
Otherwise, wear all pink and feather boas for all I care.
But I'll give the concept of uniform changes this: It is interesting.
The Seahawks new uniforms are significantly different than the ones that they've been wearing since 2002. I thought that the change would be subtle based on the leaked logo but overall the Hawks have transformed into something more like you'd see on Any Given Sunday than what we're used to on actual NFL Sundays. Seattle's got new fonts on the numbers and the colors seem more vibrant. It's unlike anything we've really seen before and what was really to be expected from a company run by Phil Knight? Especially since Knight is a native of Portland. It makes perfect sense when I really think about it right now as I wrote that sentence.
"Hey boys, do something extra special for the Seahawks or I'll send you to one of our overseas facilities."
The Hawks have had many tweaks to the uni's since their inception in 1976, but this is really only the second major one. I did a little bit of research and looked into the history of Hawks uniforms and below are my findings and observations. Join me, jerk.
Sorry, you are not a jerk. But as long as you went past the jump that means you know that I actually love you. Isn't that nice satisfaction?
I actually had to do very little research thanks to mickelyantz.com, where there's a seriously well-researched page on the history of the Hawks uniforms. This makes my job entirely way too easy.
Things started out in 1976 with this:
Now, there were some changes along the way in the next 25 years but what I want to really emphasize is that the uniforms in 2001 looked like this:
It's like a "Find the Differences" page in Highlights magazine, despite 25 years of change. The numbers were moved up to the shoulder pads, the socks are different, the logo has been added to the sleeves, the font is changed slightly. That's not much crazy different. Compare that to 25 years of television styles:
Somehow in 25 years we could go from Fonzi to Friends on TV but the Hawks added a thing here and some stuff there and basically looked the same with Jon Kitna as they did with Jim Zorn. (Seahawks finished 19th in yards in 1976 and 19th in yards in 2000 so my science checks out!)
Is it any coincidence that when the uniforms had a serious change in 2002 that the Hawks attitude also had a serious change?
Is it?! I mean, is it?!! The Hawk is angrier now. He just found out that he could have saved 15% on his car insurance by switching to Geico but he already signed up for a lifetime contract with Vern Fonk.
The uniforms that will always be remembered from 2002-2011 though will of course be the blue on blue:
The Hawks wore that uniform 76 times and went 49-27. Compare that to the white on whites: 22-30! The Seahawks went 6-2 in the playoffs in blue on blue and 0-4 in white on white! Overall, the Hawks went 2-10 in the white tops with blue pants and 0-1 in the vice versa. Those neon greens?
Seattle abandoned them after one stinkin' game! It's all Jim Mora's fault. :(
Overall, the Hawks were successful from their major uniform (and stadium and coaching and getting more talented players) change in 2002 and one can only hope that the same rings true for these uniforms with an even badder attitude. Seattle waited 25 years for their first major change and only 10 years for the next. I can only assume that by 2019 we will see big metal spikes on the shoulder pads and spinners on the shoes.
Or if we're really lucky, this:
Have you ever seen a Seahawk.... on weed?
I think the new uniforms are neat because they are different. It's not so much the design or the look, as much as it is the fact that it didn't turn out to be "Hey, we put a Nike logo on each buttock!" It would have been lame if all of this lead-up was all for naught but it's real. It happened. The uniforms are actually different and much like in 2002, it seems like it happened to a young team on the upswing.
If they only wear these greys once though, I'll be pissed.