FanPost

Time for Playoff Beards

USA TODAY Sports

The Seahawks are excelling in almost every aspect right now except for one: beards. Where are the beards guys? I know playoff beards are more of an NHL thing, but don't tell that to Brett Keisel... or hell, even Tom Brady.

I began to wonder how some of the players' beards would grow out. Using high tech computers and complex algorithms, I was able to create the following renderings.

Richard Sherman:
Richard is a bad bad man; Samuel L. Jackson with dreads. His playoff beard would tell everybody on first glance that their ass is 'bout to get whooped.

Richard_large

Red Bryant:
Big Red is a gentleman at heart and thus requires a gentlemen's beard. This fine sir tips his cap to you and wishes all the fine madams good day.

Red_large

Jon Ryan:
Jon swore off the viking lifestyle when he chopped his beautiful locks. He now leans towards a more civilized look.

Jon_large

Marshawn Lynch:
Beastmode can grow any full length beard he wants in mere hours -- nay... minutes. Guessing the style of his beard is like trying to guess the shape a cloud will take... but I like guessing so here is my guess.

Marshawn_large

Russell Wilson:
Is there anything Russell can't do? What makes you think Russell can't grow the biggest, bushiest beard? He can. Grizzly Adams asks Russell for advice. Abraham Lincoln had a picture of Russell in his pocket watch. Russell is Spanish for "beard". True stuff.

Russell_large

I am sure that you all have your own varying beard simulation technology and I would love to see what your machines produce. So please post your results below.

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