My Man with Two First Names


The man that I like seeing on the sidelines the most and on the field the least is Jon Ryan. When that happens, it typically means that we are scoring a lot of points, Russell Wilson is carving up the other team like it is Thanksgiving, Marshawn is eating his Skittles, Sherman's jaw is tired from all the truth he spews, and ET(3) has phoned home because humans don't play like he does.

Truth be told, my ADD led me on a tangent of looking at the Seahawks statistics and for some unknown reason I clicked on "Jon Ryan." At first, I was questioning my sanity, then I went insane and started to read PUNTER STATS. Delving further into my insanity, I began to look at his stats for this year. My mandible promptly detached itself and were it not for the floor, it would be in China by now.

Getting the irrelevant stats out of the way (7 career tackles, no field goals or points, a wicked 118.8 Quarterback Rating - eat your heart out Eli, and a whopping negative 31 rushing yards) helps me figure out what this guy really does. He isn't going to be an All-Pro safety, place kicker or running back (although he might have a career at QB when he grows up). He is a punter...and a ginger!

Now that I know what he does, the question remains, how does he do it and is he good?

First, he uses his leg. And I would venture to say that his leg is one of the best 32 in pro football for punting. Just a hunch but I think I am right about that.

Anyways, onto the (career) numbers.

8 years in the league including this year (2 with GB and the rest

He is averaging 4.86440677.... punts per game. Not sure how he gets that decimal but he does a good job at getting a lot of numbers after the decimal.

Furthermore, he averages 45 yards per punt with a career long of 77 yards (aka 231 feet), has only 4 blocked punts in his career and 10.3 percent of all his punts are touchbacks. A full 32.4 percent are inside the 20 (ridiculous if you really think about that) and it has only been creeping up and up the longer he has been with the 'Hawks. The average return of his punts is 9.4 yards.

Compare all that with this year. 43.6 yds/punt, 69 long (207 feet), 1 blocked punt (AGHH!!!!), 11.5% touchback rating (I remember two that were about 2 inches away from being downed inside the 1), 38.5% inside the 20. And then the stats that caused my mandible to detach...only 6 punts have been returned (projecting to a total of 14 for the year!!!) AND 8 return yards. E-I-G-H-T. Eight...ocho...One more than seven and one less than nine. Eight freaking yards. That is only 1.3 yards per return!

Seriously...what the hell?

The only way my brain can comprehend this is by saying...42.6 yards from the line of scrimmage is where the other team is starting from when the Seahawks face fourth down. I have no clue if there is a record for fewest attempted punt returns on the books, or fewest punt return yards, but I would lay odds that Jon Ryan is on pace to break those records.

This tells me a few things. (1) Jon Ryan is a badass ginger that could kick anyone of us into orbit (2) The Seahawks cover team and punter are AMAZING (3) The Seahawks are damn good because he rarely punts this season because he is on pace for a career low in that category as well. (4) Eight. (5) 1.3...ain't no one ever going to return.

Go My Man with Two First Names!!! Now stay on the sideline (except to hold the fg/pat attempts)!!!

*all stats come from some major sports network based out of Connecticut or something like that...if you don't believe me go to ( Do your own homework you mooch!

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