In the wake of Ben Obomanu's departure, I have taken it upon myself to look at our team in the three years since Pete Carroll and John Schneider turned this team upside down and shook it around. Some names will bring back fond memories. Other names are Aaron Curry. But they were all Seahawks, and this is a post to commemorate those men. (NOTE: All roster lists are from the BEGINNING of the season, so midseason cuts aren't being taken into account until the next season is recorded.)
2009- The fall of the seventh kingdom.
It was a dark time for Seattle. The great king Holmgren had taken the team to the Superbowl not four years ago, only to be laid low by the dread sorcerer Bill Leavy, who had the power to turn goal line stops into QB rushing touchdowns and conjure holding calls from his ass the aether. But now his reign had ended, and he had failed to produce a worthy heir. King Mora was a weak and ineffectual successor, winning only five games that year. Seattle was soft and open for conquest.
Roster- the OGs
Aaron Curry (Whose name will forever be a curse of the blackest nature)
Michael Gibson
Matt Hasselbeck (The captain of the guard)
T.J. Houshmandzhadeh
Walter Jones (The greatest of them)
Ben Obomanu
Jon Ryan (A Ginger warrior of the savage north-lands)
Owen Schmitt (He of the iron forehead)
Kyle Williams
Mansfield Wrotto (Seriously, what kind of a name is Mansfield?)
2010- The Great Purge
Under Mora's weak leadership Seattle was open for attack, and a warlord by the name of Carroll came from the south in search of conquest. He laid waste to Seattle, and thus began the great purge of 2010, and the beginning of the Eighth Kingdom. One by one, the players of the old kingdom were hunted down and killed, their bodies displayed in the streets (This is figurative language by the way. I'm sure Pete Carroll didn't resort to murder. Much.) and Carroll personally cut off the head of King Mora.
Those few players who swore fealty to Carroll were allowed to live.
Remaining OGs
Jordan Babineaux
Deion Branch
Red Bryant
Deon Butler
John Carlson
Colin Cole
Aaron Curry
Justin Forsett
Michael Gibson
Matt Hasselbeck
David Hawthorne
Will Herring
Leroy Hill
Kelly Jennings
Julius Jones
Roy Lewis
Sean Locklear
Olindo Mare
Brandon Mebane
Lawyer Milloy
Cameron Morrah
Ben Obomanu
Jon Ryan
Chris Spencer
Lofa Tatupu
Craig Terrill
Marcus Trufant
Max Unger
Mansfield Wrotto
2011- A new age
Seattle settled into a period of peace after the Great Purge, it's neighbors at the time were weak and Seattle won a great victory over the Kingdom of New Orleans, consolidating it's power and ensuring an era of stability in the land. But a power was rising in the south.
The Dark Lord Scowly McBabypants was amassing a great army. Carroll knew that his roster needed to have fresh blood in the ranks if Seattle was to stand a chance against the new enemy. Carroll's trusted advisor, the wizard John Schneider, foretold of a great warrior who would be the savior of Seattle. A halfling named DangerRuss. But he wasn't here yet so Carroll settled for Tarvaris Jackson instead, who was.. OK I guess. I mean, I always liked him. He certainly wasn't going to be a long time starter but it's not like he was the worst quarterback the Seahawks have ever had. Certainly better than Charlie Whitehurst by any means.
Remaining OGs
Red Bryant
Deon Butler
John Carlson
Aaron Curry
Justin Forsett
Michael Gibson
David Hawthorne
Leroy Hill
Roy Lewis
Brandon Mebane
Cameron Morrah
Ben Obomanu
Jon Ryan
Marcus Trufant
Max Unger
2012- The Final Battle
Scowly McBabypants had arrived, and times were looking grim for Seattle. But just as all appeared to be lost, there was a beacon of light from the hilltop, and on a shining white steed came the famed warrior Matt Flynn, here to save Seattle in its darkest hour. But then, another beacon of light appeared on the hilltop next to his, and on a not quite as tall white steed came the halfling of destiny, DangerRuss. Matt Flynn was obviously disappointed by this upstaging, but he handled it like a professional.
It was a mighty battle against the hordes of McBabypants, but the Seahawks prevailed. Lynch, the beast from the wilds of Buffalo tore a swath through the enemy forces, and Kam the Chancellor personally beheaded the evil warrior Vernon Davis. DangerRuss commanded the army of Seattle to the greatest victory of our time, defeating Scowly McBabypants for all time, so that the dark lord will never ever ever rise again to threaten the world again.
Remaining OGs
Red Bryant
Deon Butler
Leroy Hill
Brandon Mebane
Cameron Morrah
Ben Obomanu
Jon Ryan
Marcus Trufant
Max Unger
Some of these men are no longer with us, but their deeds will live on in legend for all time. Except for Aaron Curry of course.
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