Hey, Readers! In case you didn't know, the National Football League is hosting a 3 month, 256 game season, with an additional 10 game postseason to determine the teams in the Super Bowl. Don't worry, after that game, the boring stuff ends and we get the endless intrigue of the offseason, such as which team logo is on Colin Kaepernick's hat, the exact amount that people should or shouldn't be offended by the Washington Redskins' excuse for a field, and the reasons why the Super Bowl loser would beat the victor in a rematch.
Personally, I can't wait for the whole thing to be over with, but I had some free time on my hands and decided to predict the season for the Seahawks. Despite my username (or perhaps thanks to my more bacchanalian tendencies), I don't have the precision some expect with computers. Therefore, I'm going to add a confidence score to each game prediction to illustrate how sure I am for about the winning team (the scores are essentially discussion fodder). The scale goes from 0-5, with 0 being totally unsure of the outcome (game is a coin flip) and 5 being absolutely certain (might as well bet your entire life savings). Enjoy!
Week 1 vs. Green BayI am scared of Aaron Rodgers. I am scared of Jordy Nelson and Randall Cobb. I am wary of Eddie Lacy. This team is going to have a pretty terrifying offense. Unfortunately for them, they start their season in the equivalent of the 6th circle of Hell for QBs (Cleveland is the 7th), CenturyLink Field. Barring any significant injuries through the rest of preseason (knocks frantically on all wood objects in apartment), this is the freshest that Russell Wilson and Marshawn Lynch are going to be all season. Despite some misgivings, our offensive line isn't actually looking offensive. Our WR depth x quality is probably the greatest its been in the JS/PC era. Additionally, to my very untrained eye, the offense looks ready to take a step forward. I am not looking at the scores of the preseason games so far, but the type of plays and the amount of successful execution we have seen. Being able to hit short passes and screens to pick up 5-8 yards is never going to be the staple of a Pete "Explosive Plays" Carroll offense, but it is going to work wonders for maintaining drives and opening up those sexy deep balls we know and love.
Oh and the defense has just had an entire offseason of pundits telling them they aren't going to be as good as they were last year. Yikes.
Seahawks win 30-21 (Confidence: 3.5)
Week 2 at San DiegoWhile San Diego enough weapons to be a dangerous offense, they lack a truly dominating WR/RB/TE that would put them in the upper echelon of offenses (DEN, GB, NO). Nonetheless, Philip Rivers is coming off one of his best seasons as a pro. He might not reach those heights again, but he reminded the league that he is a damn good quarterback. San Diego has a good running back in Ryan Matthews, but he is going to have to have the game of his life to overcome the twisted wreckage that is San Diego's defense. Wilson, Lynch, and/or Percy is going to feast and San Diego is going to get educated about what a real defense looks like.
Seahawks win 38-17 (Confidence: 4)
Week 3 vs. DenverRematch II: This One Actually Counts. The nation is expecting Denver to come out swinging, but I don't think any team in this league can take a punch like the Seahawks. Twice last year, we were down by 20+ at the half and won both games. Our defense is damn good, but Peyton isn't likely to be owned twice, especially if our pass rush doesn't improve from early preseason showings. If Peyton goes off in the first half, you might be tempted to fret, but Russell Wilson's record in games when trailing by 12+ points is 4-1. Four and one. Four. And. One. This team is never out of a game.
Seahawks win 24-23 (Confidence 1.75)
Week 4 BYER.I.P. Robin Williams
Week 5 at WashingtonHoly shit, I didn't even realize realize we played Washington this year. I expect a fairly potent rushing attack from Washington, but I am seriously unimpressed with their defense and special teams. If RGIII is healthy, this game is close-ish, if he has succumbed to FedEx field, it turns into a laugher. The biggest concern I have with this game is injury. Fingers crossed that we leave unscathed first, victorious second.
Seahawks win 24-14 (Confidence 3.5)
Week 6 vs. DallasSome may consider me a Romo fanboy, but he gets an inordinate amount of shit from people who haven't actually looked at his 'clutch' stats. Romo is a good QB with a good running back and Dez Bryant (top 5 WR, in my opinion), definitely top 10, stuck on a team with an awful defense. It doesn't look like that defense is going to be anything better than bad this year and that means that this is going to be a game that reminds the nation that Wilson was a darkhorse MVP candidate last year and/or Percy Harvin will remind the league that he was the leading MVP candidate before he hurt himself in 2012. Pull up a seat folks, they'll be fireworks (and maybe a Tarvaris Jackson sighting).
Seahawks win 38-21 (Confidence 4)
Week 7 at Saint LouisSo far, our toughest tests are going to be against 1. Denver, 2. Green Bay, and now 3. St. Louis. St. Louis has stacked up on talent for years with bottom of the barrel finishes and has one of the most talented front 4's in the league. If our offensive line is as bad as many pundits have predicted, this game is going to be ugly. While the Rams are still quarterbacked by Sam "Moneybags" Bradford, even he is able to occasionally flash brilliance. The LOB can't be perfect every week, and I think this is the Tampa Bay game part 2, this time without the opponent Schiano-ing away their lead.
Rams win 17-13 (Confidence 1)
Week 8 at CarolinaUgh, back to back games against great defensive lines. Can we give the Lombardi back and get a cakewalk schedule? (upon further research that seems to be what Denver did, this phenomenon is also know as "playing in the AFC) However, Carolina has less WR talent than St. Louis (shocking, I know) while there secondary is as bad or worse. After the battering (not in terms of score, but physicality) we got from St. Louis, I think the team gets amped up and silences doubters and hand-wringers who begin to predict the demise of the LOB.
Seahawks win 20-10 (Confidence 2.5)
Week 9 vs OaklandDespite sharing a stadium, the Raiders haven't had Billy Beane rub off on them. After reaching the Super Bowl after the 2002 season, Oakland has been rebuilding for the last 12 years. This time, they seem committed to the rebuild, but they are at least another draft from becoming relevant again. Wilson and company pick apart the defense, while C-Mike gets a career high in carries after Marshawn is led off the field due to safety concerns for the Raiders' defense. The LOB feasts on Schaub or Carr, whomever is starting.
Seahawks win 45-13 (Confidence 4.5)
Week 10 vs New York (Giants)Through two preseason games, Eli Manning is 1 for 9 for 6 yards. Yes its preseason, yes the results don't mean anything. But this isn't exactly encouraging, unless of course, you are playing the Giants. Oh hey, thats us! Eli isn't a bad quarterback, he just isn't a very good one, or more accurately, he is wildly inconsistent. Unfortunately for Eli, the career ending injury to David Wilson leaves the NYG backfield pretty devoid of talent. Even if Good Eli shows up, the inability to control the clock is going to be the biggest reason why the NYG fall today.
Seahawks win 27-17 (Confidence 3.75)
Week 11 at Kansas CityBattle of the Game Managers. As good as Alex Smith has looked recently, it his mostly propped up by the WCO-style offense run by Andy Reid and the occasional super human performance of Jamaal Charles (thanks for winning my fantasy league by the way!). That is exactly the kind of offense that the LOB wants to force our opponents to run. Dinking and dunking their way down the field increases the number of offensive plays, which just gives our defense that many more opportunities to create turnovers. The KC defense aren't slouches, but they aren't on the LOB's level.
Seahawks win 21-17 (Confidence 2.5)
Week 12 vs ArizonaSo it begins. This 6 week stretch of schedule is probably the roughest I can remember. But the goal isn't to win all six, its to win one game at a time. While I would never wish for a player to get an injury, it is true that the injury to Darnell Dockett helps the Seahawks (I hope he recovers fully, whenever he finishes healing). Coupled with Daryl Washington's year long suspension, Arizona's defense isn't looking so fierce. And if the Best Corner in the Game* can get burned by a Golden Tate double move, imagine how silly Percy Harvin is going to make him look.
Seahawks Win 24-14 (Confidence 3)
*the game being allowing nearly a QB rating of nearly 100 and more than 6 touchdowns
Week 13 at San FranciscoI hate these guys. I love these guys. This is the best current rivalry in sports. I love how the fans go at each other. This game is going to be absolutely brutal. Bowman could be back, Aldon Smith will likely be back, and we will be coming off a short week. The Seahawks don't get blown out, but if there was ever a game that would end in the Seahawks losing in a blowout, it is this game. I think that would take quite a few unlucky bounces though. It pains me to say it, but I think San Francisco takes game 1.
49ers win 21-17 (Confidence 2.25)
Week 14 at PhiladelphiaFull disclosure, I have family that went Oregon State, so I have no love for Chip Kelly. But damn, if it isn't interesting to see his offenses work. I think Foles' season was a fluke, but he is a capable quarterback (think Cutler level). The upside of a Thursday night game is that we get extra couple of days of rest. I think we are going to need it before going against Philly. I think the whole team looks sharper than the previous week, shocking the doubters, and neutering Philly's offense. However, this game is probably the one that I am least sure about, due to Kelly's lack of history in the NFL.
Seahawks win 27-20 (Confidence 1)
Week 15 vs. San FranciscoRevenge of the Sith ...wait Nerds ...wait LOB... there we go! San Francisco is going to be riding high after taking game one from us, but I am pretty sure the Niners' WR will be put on the LOB's No Fly List. I expect Seattle and San Francisco to be battling for the NFC West and even top 1 or 2 seed in the NFC. I trust PC, the coaching staff, and the players' leadership to keep the Hawks in the "1-0 every week", "Every game is the same" mentality, but the fans are going to be turned up to 11. The players are going to leave this game black and blue and the fans are going to leave wondering if they should call the police for battery and assault.
Seahawks win 34-20 (Confidence 3)
Week 16 at ArizonaBig potential let down game here, but without their LB corps from a year ago, I don't see Arizona holding back this offense enough to stay in it. This ends up being a comfortable win, with the score closer than the game actually was.
Seahawks win 27-20 (Confidence 3)
Week 17 vs Saint LouisThe conclusion of the regular season. Seahawks fighting to win to go one and oh, Saint Louis fighting for relevancy. At this point Saint Louis' talent will have revealed itself to everybody (except Rams' fans expecting next year to be The Year). If the defensive line comes together like it could and if the receivers are as talented as their draft position, this game is a one score affair. If not, it turns into 2013 week 17 redux. I am giving the Rams the benefit of the doubt here, but after 16 weeks of football, I doubt I could name the entire starting DL and WR corps for St. Louis.
Seahawks win 20-15 (Confidence 2)
14-2, perfect, but the crucial bit is getting into the post season, and I like our odds against any post season NFC team and whatever the AFC vomits up.
Go Hawks!