FanPost

5 answers to 5 questions

Monday morning,

After my pinpoint prediction yesterday regarding the outcome of the Atlanta game I feel bold enough to address some issues I encountered last week.

While reading various articles and posts last week I have encountered questions posed by experts regarding the Seahawks. I felt like a child in class thinking he knows the answer and raising his hand frantically trying to get the teachers attention. It was a funny feeling since it was very unlikely that I, a dumb fan, know the answers to questions that are troubling the experts covering the NFL.

However, after my late success in predicting the game correctly where many others failed I feel poised to publish my 5 answers to 5 questions.

Question no. 1:

What should the Seahawks do to quiet the critics?

When I read this question I was sure it was a trick question. The answer was too obvious to merit a discussion. Then, I realized that I had an unfair advantage not commonly available. Last week, after the bombardment of articles claiming that allowing more then 200 yards a game has seriously dropped the seahawks status as a contender I took it upon myself to check in depth what are the NFL rules regarding the standing of a team. Imagine my shock when I found out that rushing yards are not even mentioned in there at all. Not even in the elaborate tie breaker formulas. I then published my revolutionary findings and complained against the narrow view adopted by the NFL to value wins instead of the all mighty rushing yards allowed. It was this knowledge that provided me with the answer to the question. The correct answer to what should the seahawks do to quiet the critics is simple – NOTHING. You see, quiet critics are actually like rushing yards allowed. The NFL will not reward a team with quiet critics over a team with load critics. I bet very few knew this fact. It is with great pride that I provide my first educated answer to this question that has bothered the experts. The Seahawks does not need to do a damn thing to quiet the critics.

Question no. 2:

In his elaborate article yesterday, noted NFL expert Adam Schien has expressed his valued and educated opinions regarding the Seahawks poor play and stated the following – He would be stunned if the 49ers will lose any of their 'theoretically" tough games against Car and at NO (surpizzzzzze...). He sees the 49ers winning the super Bowl and he predicts that Drew brees and the Saints will hand Wilson the fist home loss of his career. Obviously I was in tears after reading the end of our season black on white. The question raised was crystal clear – Are the 49ers the team to beat in the NFC?

I thought I had the answer and as it turns out I was dead right again. Without further delay, the answer is YES. The 49ers are indeed the team to beat in the NFC. If anyone doubts that they are invited to see how happy the Panthers looked doing just that yesterday. As for the other questions regarding Schein's notable in depth understanding of the game I feel I am not worthy of providing answers. If he was working for me at my company and proved to be as well informed as that article was he would be looking for a job on Monday.

Question no. 3:

Is the Seahawks the worst 8-1 team in the NFL?

Ok, that one was dumb. The Seahawks are 9-1 not 8-1. Duh.

Question no. 4:

Can the Seahawks overcome the problems they have with their injury depleted roster?

Here I adopted a more scientific test and observation method to seek the answer.

Case study – Seahawks November 10th 2013-

Missing players: Okung, Giacominy, Unger, Bryant, Rice, Harvin, Browner and McDaniel (during).

Results – game 33-10W, season 9-1.

Scientific analysis answer – Sure, no problem.

Question no. 5:

This one keeps popping for over a year. It's a big one.

Which of the new sophomore QBs will lead his team to greater glory?

To answer this one I will do what everybody else does and look at the last game they played-

RGIII – scored 3 TDs compared to RW meager 2TDs.

LUCK – passed for 354 yards compared to RW's pedestrian 287 yards.

It is therefore my humble unbiased opinion that the answer to this question remains as it was. NFL experts and pundits are never wrong, Luck is no. 1, RGIII is a close second (I got that right skip?) and RW is way to short to play in the NFL and the idea that he can lead a team to victories is utterly preposterous.(or more bluntly - A billion flies can't be wrong, EAT SHIT)

There you have it – 5 answers to 5 questions.

Or in a nutshell – the dogs bark, the caravan goes on, 9-1 bitches, 9-1.