clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

NFL unPower Rankings, Week 12, 2014 NFL Mock Draft, Tweets from @JustinBieber: The SEO Trifecta!

Why read three articles when you can read just one? This is the one that takes your boy Kenneth Arthur straight to the top!

Otto Greule Jr

It's time again for the unPower Rankings, but as SBNation has released their first 2014 NFL Mock Draft, I figured it was a good time for me to do the same. And where better than to do a mock draft than during a reverse power rankings?!

Today, November 19, 2013, I will rule the roost of the SEO kingdom!

And if that wasn't going to be enough, why not a power trifecta:

- NFL Power Rankings

- 2014 NFL Mock Draft

- Tweets from Justin Bieber

That's right, you get all those things, together, right now, for FREE! FREE! FREE!

#HoldTight

1. Jaguars (1-9) Last week: 1

@justinbieber: A lot of things get said about me. So many things not true. And it hurts especially that people believe it. But I got all of u so.... I'm built for this. It's all gonna be alright :) love u and thanks.

The pick: Teddy Bridgewater, QB, Louisville

After a scary win two weeks ago, the Jags got exactly what they needed in Week 11: A respectable loss to a respectable team. Now it's only a matter of time before they've got a respectable quarterback.

Up next: at Texans

2. Vikings (2-8) Last week: 3

@justinbieber: don't cry

The pick: Derek Carr, QB, Fresno State

Josh Freeman was on the second-worst team in the NFL to open the year and will be on the second-worst team in the NFL to close the year. What does that tell you about the QB position for the Vikings?

I'm operating under the assumption that Marcus Mariota returns to school, as I think he should.

Up next: at Packers

3. Falcons (2-8) Last week: 5

@justinbieber: oops

The pick: Jadeveon Clowney, DE, South Carolina

Matt Ryan, Deion Sanders, Julio Jones, Tommy Nobis, Claude Humphrey, George Kunz, and to a lesser extent, Michael Vick, Steve Bartkowski, DeAngelo Hall, Lincoln Kennedy. The Falcons have done a decent job with top 10 picks.

Clowney could be the best since Sanders.

Up next: vs Saints

4. Texans (2-8) Last week: 6

@justinbieber: aw c'mon

The pick: Anthony Barr, OLB, UCLA

I love it when people say "He'll only get better at his new position." Really? He'll only get better? All due respect to Barr, that's certainly not true. Players that don't switch positions at all have been known to get worse (Curry anyone?) and players that do switch only seem more prone to failure. Not that it will happen to Barr, who could be a great, great pass-rusher.

The Texans still play the Jaguars twice and technically control the fate to even pick first next year. But is Bridgewater an answer for Houston?

I'm still confused as to why you pull Case Keenum against the Raiders. He wasn't playing great, but you wouldn't pull your definite starter for a performance like that. The Texans are 0-4 under Keenum but by an average of 3.25 points.

In four losses with Matt Schaub, they lost by an average of 20.

Up next: vs Jaguars

5. Redskins (3-7) Last week: 8

@justinbieber: don't deal

The pick (goes to the Rams): Jake Matthews, OT, Texas A&M

I'm not sold on everything that St. Louis has gotten out of the Robert Griffin III trade, but if they somehow manage to snag an elite left tackle out of the deal, that's pretty damn good.

The Redskins could have used pretty much anything at this point, instead they're going to see a top 10 pick slip out of their grasp and have a hard time upgrading the worst pass defense in the NFL.

Up next: vs 49ers

6. Buccaneers (2-8) Last week: 2

@justinbieber: comes with the job. More press looking for stories than any truth. Hurts sometimes but I got all of u. Thanks

The pick: Sammy Watkins, WR, Clemson

If they pick this high, Greg Schiano was almost certainly fired and then perhaps they re-address the QB situation. However, getting another weapon on offense is also a thing, and the Bucs definitely could use one of those.

Up next: at Lions

7. Titans (4-6) Last week: 9

@justinbieber: I'm normal not innocent. But I'm not evil or unkind either. I'm trying

The pick: Taylor Lewan, OT, Michigan

Michael Roos will be entering the final year of his deal next season, is owed zero bonuses, and will be 32. If you're going to put Jake Locker back there again next season, you can't risk a shaky situation at left tackle. This is the most sensible pick ever.

Meanwhile, Ryan Fitzpatrick's numbers are starting to best Locker's...

Tennessee plays four of the next five games on the road. They might not be picking this low.

Up next: at Raiders

8. Raiders (4-6) Last week: 4

@justinbieber: learned a lot through trial and error trying to make it right. #recovery

The pick: Hasean Clinton-Dix, S, Alabama

I struggled with this pick more than any other so far. Not because I didn't know what the Raiders needed, but I couldn't figure out what they didn't. Oakland continues to be the laughingstock of the NFL draft and yet they're only a game out of the AFC playoffs. Which says more about the AFC than it does Oakland, but still...

I think they just draft the best defensive player available and opt to stick with Pryor and McGloin at quarterback. I almost went with CJ Mosely, but they just signed Nick Roach to a four-year deal. They need a stable player that can lead what is now a pretty crappy pass defense.

Also, this summer, a sequel to Rookie of the Year:

Screen_shot_2013-11-19_at_6

Up next: vs Titans

9. Bills (4-7) Last week: 7

@justinbieber: IM so proud :)

The pick: Mike Evans, WR, Texas A&M

The "Buffalo linebacker Khalil Mack going to Buffalo" pick is so obvious it just has to be the case, right? Just like how Doug Marrone was so obviously going to take Ryan Nassib.

Stevie Johnson is the Bills tallest wide receiver, and he's 6'2. Marrone needs his "Marques Colston" for the offense to really start to take off. Beating the Jets isn't that hard to do -- depending on if it's at home and New York is coming off of a win.

Up next: Bye

10. Packers (5-5) Last week: 16

@justinbieber: get better soon

The pick: Jace Amero, TE, Texas Tech

Things are perhaps even worse than expected without Aaron Rodgers. How wild would it be for Green Bay to take a quarterback in the first round, even a former controversial Heisman winner? Instead, it's time to replace Jermichael Finley, who might not ever play again.

PS - This draft needs a good cornerback in the worst way.

Up next: vs Vikings

11. Rams (4-6) Last week: 11

@justinbieber: ok

The pick: David Yankey, OG, Stanford

It's not wild anymore to consider guards as top 15 picks. Doubling-down on offensive line wouldn't be a bad idea for St. Louis.

Don't be fooled by a 4-6 record and forget that the Rams have looked pretty bad at times this year and don't excel in rush offense, rush defense, pass offense, or pass defense. They could use it all, but upgrading their offensive line to this degree would help both areas of offense.

Up next: Bears

12. Steelers (4-6) Last week: 12

@justinbieber: Giving feels way better than receiving. Give to others. Give of yourself. In return you will feel more happiness than u have ever known

The pick: C.J. Mosely, LB, Alabama

They could really take just about anyone and they'll be able to plug him in and get younger at whatever position that is. Last year, Jarvis Jones slid to them and this year it could be someone like Mack or Mosely.

By winning four of their last six, and nearly every remaining game being winnable, the Steelers might instead wind up in the playoffs again because AFC.

Up next: at Browns

13. Dolphins (5-5) Last week: 10

@justinbieber: IT IS NOT OK! ;)

The pick: Cyrus Kouandjio, OT, Alabama

Pretty lucky to wind up with a tackle prospect this solid at 13.

Up next: vs Panthers

14. Giants (4-6) Last week: 13

@justinbeiber: Can't believe or dwell on the bs. Just gotta know your truth. U can't bring us down. And @DavidHasselhoff everyone loved BayWatch.

The pick: Khalil Mack, OLB, Buffalo

From "NASCAR" to "Go Karts" the leading sack-getter on the Giants has 3.5 of them. Mack stays in state.

If New York wins this week, they'll have tied the Cowboys in the standings after they were three games back just four weeks ago.

Up next: vs Cowboys

15. Ravens (4-6) Last week: 14

@justinbieber: Recovery is too powerful to not be recocnized...

The pick: Cameron Erving, OT, Florida State

If the draft somehow doesn't end up with the Ravens picking a tackle here, it's because they traded up for a tackle they like better. It's insane how bad Ray Rice has looked up until last week. Conversely, Baltimore's defense is quietly great again but they're held back by an offense that hasn't scored more than 20 points since October 6.

Up next: vs Jets

16. Jets (5-5) Last week: 15

@justinbieber: BTW ITS THAT HOLD ON TIGHT ... NOT THEY HOLD ON TIGHT SMH LOL

The pick: Marqise Lee, WR, USC

The leading receiver on the Jets (Jeremy Kerley) has 347 yards. That's nine more yards than Knowshon Moreno, the fifth-leading receiver on the Broncos.

New York can't win on the road but they also can't lose back-to-back games, so what gives this week at Baltimore?

Up next: at Ravens

17. Browns (4-6) Last week: 18

@justinbieber: every week im sharing my heart with you. thanks for accepting me.

The pick: Johnny Manziel, QB, Texas A&M

Sort of a risky pick, but it's the right one for Cleveland. They need a quarterback and they need an exciting star that will actually make people want to tune in to watch the Browns. Josh Gordon is on a 1,500-yard pace in eight games this year.

Up next: vs Steelers

18. Chargers (4-6) Last week: 19

@justinbieber: they arent ready

The pick: Vic Beasley, DE, Clemson

They haven't been too lucky with injuries but either way this team can't rush the passer. Melvin Ingram has one career sack, and with him out this year, there's a four-way tie for the team lead but only three sacks apiece. The Chargers are 31st in net yards per pass allowed and 30th in yards per carry allowed.

Up next: at Chiefs

19. Cowboys (5-5) Last week: 20

@justinbieber: There are certain people out there waiting to see you fall. #ChristmasDay

The pick: Louis Nix, DT, Notre Dame

Switching from Rob Ryan to Monte Kiffin, the defense has gone from 24th in scoring to... 25th. Jason Hatcher has seven sacks from the interior but is going to be a 32-year-old free agent. The worst news of all for Tony Romo and Cowboys fans:

December is almost here.

Up next: at Giants

21. Bears (6-4) Last week: 23

@justinbieber: nah I can beat it. But #HoldTight

The pick: Zach Mettenberger, QB, LSU

There should be plenty of quarterbacks taken in the first two rounds this year and if Jay Cutler can't beat out Josh McCown, it's hard to see if he'll be able to convince Chicago to give him the contract he thinks he deserves. Another team certainly might do it, but he may have finally worn out his welcome unless he somehow comes back and then leads the Bears to the playoffs.

Hey, it worked for Joe Flacco and the Ravens.

If they don't re-sign him, they'll have to re-place him. It's hard to argue with draft a QB that carries a four-year guarantee of about $20 million instead of giving a six-year contract at almost $20 million per to a guy like Cutler. They can re-sign McCown instead, draft Mettenberger, and go from there.

Also, their defense kind of sucks, so maybe they don't go with a QB at all!

Up next: at Rams

22. Lions (6-4) Last week: 24

@justinbieber: What do tigers dream of

The pick: Jason Verrett, CB, TCU

A nickel for your slots?

Detroit's corners are old, not good. I went with the bold move of predicting that the Lions wind up with the number two seed in the playoffs and following a loss to Pittsburgh, that's not looking as smart. Their remaining schedule though, including a road game at Philadelphia, is pretty easy.

Up next: vs Bucs

20. Eagles (6-5) Last week: 17

@justinbieber: I always keeps it interesting :)

The pick: Trent Murphy, DE, Stanford

All of the numbers for Philly look good but beating the Redskins twice, beating the Packers without Aaron Rodgers, beating the Bucs and Raiders and Giants... We know they are better than bad teams but are they as good as good teams? They still need an improved front seven.

Up next: Bye

23. Bengals (7-4) Last week: 21

@justinbieber: I missed my cat. #homesweethome

The pick: Ifo Ekpre-Olomu, CB, Oregon

Leon Hall, Terrance Newman and Adam Jones are all going to be possible cap casualties in 2014. The Bengals run a solid defense and a solid pass defense, but there's no reason to think they can't upgrade their secondary with a pick like Epre-Olomu, if he's even available here.

Up next: Bye

24. Cardinals (6-4) Last week: 22

@justinbieber: never say never

The pick: Antonio Richardson, OT, Tennessee

After 10 games, the Arizona Cardinals have the same record as the San Francisco 49ers. Yep, that just happened. *sunglasses* *finger gunz*

When they signed Carson Palmer, I wrote that the 2012 Arizona Cardinals might have made the playoffs with a good quarterback. Which is guess is an obvious statement to make about any team, but really this was a fairly terrible team that was one player away from being good. And not necessarily a great player, but just a better player than the worst players.

Adding Richardson (and then 2012 first round pick Jonathan Cooper coming back from IR) will only make Arizona that much better.

Up next: vs Colts

25. Colts (7-3) Last week: 25

@justinbieber: I don't mess with chuck

The pick (Goes to Browns): Jordan Matthews, WR, Vanderbilt

The Colts lost by 30 points to the Rams two games ago and are now the number two seed in the AFC. Yep, that just happened. *sunglasses* *fly into the sun*

With this pick, Manziel can be paired with another receiver other than Gordon.

Up next: at Cardinals

26. Chiefs (9-1) Last week: 27

@justinbieber: stop crying. Lol

The pick: Eric Ebron, TE, North Carolina

The loss to Denver was about as we had predicted. They just can't score enough points to keep up with the best teams. They need to address the quarterback position and Brett Hundley is available, but I think they can stick with Alex Smith for now, add a QB later, and instead add a big weapon. The Chiefs seem pretty deep at tight end, but like Inception, they can go deeper.

Up next: vs Chargers

27. 49ers (6-4) Last week: 29

@justinbieber: to all my fans at the hotel. thank u. i love u. but please calm down and respect the police. we dont want anyone gettting hurt.

The pick: Allen Robinson, WR, Penn State

The Niners almost look like a version of the Chiefs that have played a tougher schedule. Anquan Boldin is going to be a 34-year-old free agent, we still don't know the future of Michael Crabtree once he finally returns, and 49ers have been desperately seeking a receiver for a couple years now.

Robinson is one of those.

Up next: at Redskins

28. Patriots (7-3) Last week: 28

@justinbieber: I will be ok. I'm built for this.

The pick: Austin Seferian-Jenkins, TE, Washington

They pretty clearly prefer having two great tight ends and it's possible that ASJ could be one of the top five players in this draft when it's all said and done.

Up next: vs Broncos

29. Saints (8-2) Last week: 26

@justinbieber: that was wild.

The pick: Ryan Shazier, OLB, Ohio State

This would be a pretty good get for New Orleans, but this appears to be a very deep draft.

The Saints play four of the next five on the road. Three of those games are against teams presently ranked in the final three spots. They just racked up their most quality win of the year and if they beat the Falcons and Seahawks in the next two weeks, they'll have the inside track on the number one seed. Which would be important, since the Saints are just 2-2 on the road this year.

Up next: at Falcons

30. Panthers (7-3) Last week: 30

@justinbieber: proven

The pick: Cyril Richardson, OG, Baylor

Conversely, the Panthers can still win out and take the NFC South and the number two seed. (It seems hard to imagine that 13-3 would beat the Seahawks for the number one seed, considering Seattle also has the tiebreaker.)

Up next: at Dolphins

31. Broncos (9-1) Last week: 31

@justinbieber: she loves my little pony

The pick: Will Sutton, DT, Arizona State

This might be high for Sutton, but Denver is exactly the type of team that can take a chance on him.

Quietly, the Broncos defense has tightened things up since their loss to the Colts. Jack Del Rio is likely going to get another head coaching gig after this.

Up next: at Patriots

32. Seahawks (10-1) Last week: 32

@justinbieber: sorry I took so long

The pick: Stephon Tuitt, DE, Notre Dame

With guard Zack Martin and tackle Cedric Ogbeuhi available, why not shore up a weakness instead of strengthen a strength? I don't believe that's the strategy of successful football teams. The Seahawks are 10-1 despite poor play by the offensive line. Is it bigger to have to figure out what to do without Breno Giacomini or wondering if J.R. Sweezy is ever going to be a good guard, or is it more important to have a reliable backup to your pass-rushing situation?

Both Michael Bennett and Cliff Avril will be (a) free agents and neither will be accepting a one-year deal again. (?) (No way!) Besides, Super Bowl teams always spin-off over-priced free agents and we don't need our future champion Seattle Seahawks to fall into that trap.

*Minor detail is that Avril might not be a free agent, but I am not afraid to keep the pick the way it is.

They can just take the BPA and that is very arguably Tuitt. Not that I don't expect them to trade the pick anyway.

Up next: Bye