Bruce Arians, Jason Witten join the ever-changing world of NFL game analysts

If you dislike former Arizona Cardinals head coach Bruce Arians, then you’re probably thrilled that he announced his retirement at the end of last season. Now with that said, can you tolerate him as an in-game analyst? Because that’s the next phase of his life.

CBS Sports announced on Thursday that the two-time Super Bowl winner will join Greg Gumbel and Trent Green starting next season.

“I always hoped that broadcasting would be an option after I retired from coaching as a way to stay involved with this great game,” said Arians. “I am thrilled to have that opportunity with such a class organization as CBS Sports. As I begin my new career in the broadcast booth, I am excited to join Greg, Trent and Jamie and look forward to learning from them, as well as sharing my passion and knowledge for the game with the fans.”

Gumbel and Green are essentially CBS’ #3 team behind Jim Nantz/Tony Romo and Ian Eagle/Dan Fouts, so Arians should get a decent slate of games throughout the season. Ideally he’s not calling the Seattle Seahawks’ lone CBS home date, which is November 4th against the Los Angeles Chargers. We know when Arians shows up to CenturyLink Field, Seattle usually loses.

Also retiring and heading straight for broadcasting is Jason Witten, who hung up the cleats after 15 seasons with the Dallas Cowboys. Witten will most likely be in Canton a few years down the road, having amassed over 1,100 catches and more than 12,000 yards, along with 11 Pro Bowl selections.

Because Witten is a former Cowboy, he’s basically entitled to a high-profile television gig. ESPN will have him as Monday Night Football’s lead analyst, making him the third ex-Cowboys player currently set as a top color commentator. Tony Romo is already at CBS, and Troy Aikman has been on FOX’s A-team for well over a decade. Witten will reportedly make $4 million per year. Sean McDonough is no longer MNF’s play-by-play voice, as he’s going back to the college game. He also basically admitted to not liking the job, so if you ever had a suspicion that he sounded bored as hell, this should confirm the reason. He’ll reportedly be replaced by Joe Tessitore, he of boxing and college football fame.

Romo was a revelation last year, in part because Phil Simms was so awful that Romo’s bar to clear to be superior to Phil was ankle-high. Hopefully Witten can be just as good! Arians? Well... we’ll always have this.