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The Seahawks defense will be staring history in the eye on Sunday night in Pittsburgh

Seattle Seahawks v San Francisco 49ers Photo by Thearon W. Henderson/Getty Images

After the Seahawks fell to 2-3 on Thursday night, the only thing that I could think about was how my preseason prediction that they Seahawks would reach the bye with a 6-2 record had been neutered in the most painful manner possible - with a loss to the effing Rams.

My pseudonym is NOT a fan of irony.

Nor is it a fan of paragraphs.

Which is why I am ignoring a certain member’s suggestion that I should write an article in paragraph form if the Hawks fell to the FTRs.

I did find the suggestion amusing though - which is why I am going to offer to write an article next week using nothing but paragraphs IF ...

Seattle’s defense makes history.

The BAD kind of history.

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For those that may have missed it, ESPN’s Brady Henderson sent out this Tweet after Seattle’s most recent Jekyll and Hyde performance:

The numbers:

  • Week 1, at Indianapolis: 336 yards allowed
  • Week 2, vs. Tennessee: 532 yards allowed
  • Week 3, at Minnesota: 453 yards allowed
  • Week 4, at San Francisco: 457 yards allowed
  • Week 5, vs. Los Angeles: 476 yards allowed

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Focusing only on the last 4 games (i.e. the ones that “matter” for the record):

  • Titans: 320 passing, 212 rushing
  • Vikings: 313 passing, 140 rushing
  • 49ers: 314 passing, 143 rushing
  • FTRs: 358 passing, 118 rushing
  • Average: 326.3 passing, 153.3 rushing

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Bottom line: Seattle’s defense has been equally bad in both phases - and pretty consistently too.

Next up: The Pittsburgh Steelers ... at Heinz Field.

On the bright side, the Stealers (yep, still bitter) are struggling and have a 2-3 record to prove it. They’re currently the cellar dweller in the AFC North and their offense is averaging a hair under 320 yards per game.

On the not-so-bright side, it is very likely that none of that will matter when it comes to Seattle’s defense.

Why?

Let’s start with the most recent game.

The Rams (476) average 391.3 yards per game when they’re not playing Seattle. That’s a difference of 84.7 yards.

Sounds bad, right?

It’s actually the defense’s best -slash- smallest difference over the last 4 weeks.

Here are the other 3 “performances”:

  • Vikings: 453 against Seattle with an average of 365.3 versus the rest of the league (difference of 87.7 yards)
  • Niners: 457 vs. 346 (difference of 111 yards)
  • Titans: You don’t want to know.

Seriously.

Do. Not. Want. To. Know.

Okay, fine ... Seattle’s defense allowed the Titans to accumulate 178.5 more yards than they averaged against their other 4 foes ... 532 vs. Seattle; 353.5 vs. everyone else.

And, before you go thinking the Titans’ numbers are skewed because they have played some really good teams ...

Just to drive this point home ...

The Seahawks gave up 284 more yards to the Titans than the Cardinals did, 164 more yards than either the Colts or the Jaguars did, and 82 more yards than the Jets did.

That’s pretty sad.

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So ...

After watching the Steelers put up 391 yards against the Broncos on Sunday, who thinks they can top 450 yards against the Seahawks?

Anyone?

Yeah ... you’re not alone.

Personally, I don’t think it will happen.

Which is why I’m willing to wager the dreaded paragraph-style article on it.

Call it blind naivety, unbridled optimism run amok, or a combination thereof, but I think Seattle’s defense is going to shock the world on Sunday Night Football.

And NOT in a bad way.

I think they have too damn much pride to allow 450+ yards five straight games.

I also think Seattle will win, 28-14, and even their record at 3-3.

Go Hawks!