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Gonzo

The bet that never will be

The NFL sports media world was aflutter with news that one of their poster boys would be less poster-appealing. And then reality set in.

FG Video Preview: Week 1

Its that time again!

Rapping with The Drunkard: The Oakland Raiders

The most fascinating drunk guy at this bar is here to tell you all about The Raiders. Probably also his medication. And the Government.

Rapping with The Drunkard: The Green Bay Packers

The most fascinating drunk guy at this bar is here to tell you all about our next fowl...I mean foe. /Hiccup

Seahawks Preseason Week 1: The Thuperchargers

SAN DIEGO: Kneel, and look upon the iconography of your conquers.

Super Cool Dude Hawks

Seattle Seahawks? More like cash money billionaires. The Hawks are the talks, and yes, this shit is real.

What the Ospreys are tweeting

Apparently there was a grip of twelves down in San Diego making some noise during the game.

Perfect Season continues: Rams

The Rams are supposedly a team that's trending upwards, but the last time we heard that they went 2-14. What's different about this year, and what could they possibly do to stop my perfect seasonne?

The Drunkard's Player Profiles: Bobby Wagner

An analysis of the Seahawks' players, as told by the most fascinating drunk guy in the bar.

The Dread Ship Sea Hawk

They're a comin' for ya.

The Drunkard's Player Profiles: Golden Tate

An analysis of the Seahawks' players, as told by the most fascinating drunk guy in the bar.

The Drunkard's Player Profiles: Marshawn Lynch 2

A retelling of the the history of Marshawn, as told by the most fascinating drunk guy in the bar.

Did you notice the Seahawks.com fine print?

Rarely do I have a need to use the Seahawks official website, but I've used it often enough to be surprised that I didn't notice this fine print. But I'm not surprised that it's there.

The Drunkard's Player Profiles: Russell Okung

An analysis of the Seahawks' players, as told by the most fascinating drunk guy in the bar.

Perfect Season Continues: Can't Cardly Wait

In Week 7, Seattle looks to avenge a loss in Arizona last year. They also look to avenge a 58-0 win, that totally should have been 65-0.

The Drunkard's Player Profiles: Brandon Browner

An analysis of the Seahawks' players, as told by the most fascinating drunk guy in the bar.

Lieutenant Percy Harvin

An attempt to define the undefinable.

NFL Players are people too. Sort of.

Is it possible that an NFL star really killed one or more people? How could he do this? If he did, it's probably because he's human.

Russell Wilson in the redzone & on 3rd down

Quick note.

Richard Sherman will never disappear

"You wanted this noise."

The Drunkard's Players Profiles: Michael Robinson

An analysis of the Seahawks' players, as told by the most fascinating drunk guy in the bar.

Seahawks are Real Titans of Win-dustry

Seattle has to cruise through all four AFC teams over a four week span, finally culminating in a home game against the Titans. Titans? Must have forgotten about them.

Five Reasons: Colts? More like Dolts

After a perfect 4-0 start to the year, the Hawks are 25-percent towards their goal of a season without flaws. How scary is a trip to Indy?

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Quantum Seahawks

I have this theory that for an instant, the Seahawks and 49rs somehow shared the same quantum state and have been fully linked together ever since.

The Drunkard's Players Profiles: Tom Cable

An analysis of a Seahawks' coach, as told by the most fascinating drunk guy in the bar.

Five Ways to Please Your Russell Wilson

Everybody wants a Russell Wilson and when you've got one, you never want to let go. We asked some experts how we could best keep our Russell Wilson's happy.

The Drunkard's Player Profiles: Earl Thomas

An analysis of the Seahawks' players, as told by the most fascinating drunk guy in the bar.

The Drunkard's Player Profiles: Kam Chancellor

An analysis of the Seahawks' players, as told by the most fascinating drunk guy in the bar.

Heath, Play, Love

Under-appreciated? Yes. Over-paid? Maybe. Seattle might have a tough decision to make between their two special teams captains.

This stream has:

The Drunkard's Player Profiles

An analysis of the Seahawks' players, as told by the most fascinating drunk guy in the bar.

The Drunkard's Player Profiles: Richard Sherman

An analysis of the Seahawks' players, as told by the most fascinating drunk guy in the bar.

Living up to the tagline "Seattle is Faster"

Because, Seattle actually is faster.

The Drunkard's Player Profiles: Russell Wilson

An analysis of the Seahawks' players, as told by the most fascinating drunk guy in the bar.

We got ourselves a stew going

Now the story of a wealthy owner with a losing team and the GM who had no choice but to keep them all together.

That one time I had to tackle Marshawn Lynch

A true ass story.

The Drunkard's Player Profiles: Marshawn Lynch

An analysis of the Seahawks' players, as told by the most fascinating drunk guy in the bar.

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