NFL Picks, Week 16: The quick and dirty breakdown

I've been blessed this week with the miracle that is forming stones in your kidneys, so this is going to be super quick.
You can hit me on Twitter sometime this weekend if you're looking to tell me which one if my picks is goofed up. Same place I've always been...

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Sunday

Miami Dolphins (-2.5) @ Buffalo Bills

I've spent the last 14 weeks overestimating the Bills, one more week couldn't hurt. I think they get it done at home against a Dolphins team destined to miss the playoffs
The pick: Bills

New Orleans Saints @ Carolina Panthers (-3)

So some people are saying the Saints can't win on the road nowadays... I definitely count myself among them. Prove me wrong New Orleans.
The pick: Panthers

Dallas Cowboys (-2.5) @ Washington Redskins

Kirk Cousins almost got it done last week, I think he finishes the job this week and effectively ends the Cowboys season.
The pick: Redskins

Tampa Bay Buccaneers @ St. Louis Rams (-5)

Two teams playing better than we all thought after playing worse than we all thought... I'll go with the home team.
The pick: Rams

Chicago Bears @ Philadelphia Eagles (-3)

Eagles run to daylight, and an NFC East championship.
The pick: Eagles

Cleveland Browns @ New York Jets (-2.5)

A road team will win this weekend. Probably more than one.
The pick: Browns

Indianapolis Colts @ Kansas City Chiefs (-6.5)

If the playoffs started today the Chiefs would play on the road against the Colts. What I mean to say is if the playoffs started today, the Colts would lose in the first round.
The pick: Chiefs

Minnesota Vikings @ Cincinnati Bengals (-7)

I'll take the Bengals because they're at home, but I wouldn't bet on them covering that spread.
The pick: Bengals

Denver Broncos (-10.5) @ Houston Texans

Broncos.
The pick: Broncos

Tennessee Titans (-5.5) @ Jacksonville Jaguars

I give the Jaguars a pretty good shot to win this game. But if I gotta pick, which I do, I'll take the road team.
The pick: Titans

Arizona Cardinals @ Seattle Seahawks (-10.5)

Lookfor rookie tight end Luke Willson to find the end zone, twice.
The pick: Seahawks

New York Giants @ Detroit Lions (-8.5)

As mundane as the Lions looked last week, the Giants looked so much worse. That and the Lions are at home, with something to play for.
The pick: Lions

Oakland Raiders @ San Diego Chargers (-10)

The Chargers are dangerous, they showed it last week. Ten points is a healthy spread, I'm not sure how I feel about that, but I know how I feel about the final outcome.
The pick: Chargers

New England Patriots @ Baltimore Ravens (-2.5)

I don't know what to make of either of these teams. One part "any given Sunday" and one part "finding their way minus a star player," this game is one I wouldn't pick if I didn't need to for the sake of the column.
The pick: Ravens

Monday

Atlanta Falcons @ San Fransisco 49ers (-13)

If only the Falcons were what we thought they'd be; this would be one hell of a game.
The pick: 49ers